We are at a strategic cultural intersection where the relationships between women and men are eroding. There is suspicion, confusion, pain, whole lot of ambiguity.
Global movements are exposing the pain of sexual harassment. And thank God. The truth will set us free.
It disrupts us. We hate chaos. We often deny, avoid, blame, hide. We look for the person to blame as if the problem is outside of us.
It is a moment to create a better world, a different world, where we are better together.
There are two things necessary for mass social change: 1) imagine a better world and 2) understand oppression.
Eldest son started kindergarten. How was it? It was boring. We told stories about what we did over the break. I made mine up.
We want a better story. I want to live a better story.
Women and men are better together. We desire this deep within us.
One of the oldest stories of origin is found in Genesis. At pinnacle of creation, God creates humanity. He makes man by himself in charge. God says “This is not good.” He creates woman. Literally a savior, helper, tutor, so we can be better together.
This is not just something we are desiring, it’s what we are designed for.
Step 1: Believe it is possible.
McKinsey Report – if women were treated equally it would add “12 trillion dollars or 28 trillion to the global economy.”
Mohammed Yunis – Nobel Peace Prize – extreme poverty. He stumbled upon women’s empowerment.
UN – one of the key to make a better world: gender equality; not just a fundamental human right, but essential to a peaceful, sustainable world.
Refuse despair. Challenge the status quo. Believe for the future. Change.
It has to be an active confrontation of fear.
Step 2: Do not be afraid.
2/3 of women are not optimistic of gender equality.
Ghandi – “We think the enemy is hate, but it is really fear.”
God’s design is for every person to be free.
I read Exodus. I knew Pharaoh was a bully. Exodus 1 – because Pharaoh was afraid of the Israelites, he oppressed them. If our reactions are fear-based, we will either be oppressed or be an oppressor.
Fear is the currency of oppression.
Seth Richardson – two concepts that need to be held – difference: we are not the same; mutuality.
Fingerprints are proof that you are different. To be human means to be unique.
When we overemphasize one difference over any other difference, it skews everything. It leads to tokenism or stereotypes.
Difference through the lens of fear is a threat; through the lens of faith is an opportunity.
Mutuality – the sharing of feelings, actions or relationships between parties.
Mandela and Desmond Tutu – ubuntu: the universal bond of sharing and unity.
Your success and failure is linked to me.
Enemies of mutuality in gender equality: power and sex.
35% of women globally have experienced physical or sexual violence
1/4 North American women will be sexually assaulted during their lifetime.
Is it any wonder women are fed up? They should be.
We hear the truth and pain of women who have suffered the realities of inequality, injustice or sexism on any level. Thank you for speaking up.
We believe the future will be better together.
1/6 internet searches are for porn. 1/5 mobile searches is for porn. 60% of men admit to viewing porn at least once a week.
What happens to your view of gender if the lens you use objectifies?
Pornography needs to be identified and confronted.
Objectification is the opposite of mutuality.
Power is the capacity or ability to influence the behavior of others.
We all have power because we all have influence.
It’s good to have a sober look at how we use the power we have. How we use the power we have is the measure of our leadership.
Misuse of power – coercion and threats
Are you kind to those you lead? Are you fair in the decisions that impact them? Can you accept change?
Misuse of power – intimidation
Do you cut people off when they are talking? Do you close yourself off?
Misuse of power – emotional abuse
Do you value and actively listen to others? Do you show regard for others?
Misuse of power – isolation
DO you encourage people to think and act widely? Do people feel included?
Misuse of power – minimizing, denying, blaming
Do you accept responsibility? Do you acknowledge when you are wrong?
Misuse of power – economic abuse
Have you mutually agreed with others about fair distribution of work? Are women invited to be part of your big decisions? Do you define the role women or men can play in your culture or organization?
Empowerment Principle: Great leaders use power to empower other people.
If power is a tool, how are you using yours?
Jesus was the greatest leader ever. Jesus literally was “Let’s come and give them power.” He was the most empowering person who ever lived.
This is no clearer than in how he interacted with women. He invited them to be disciples. When Martha comes screaming, it’s not because of dishes. It’s because of the social implications.
Jesus invited women to be a part of a new system called the kingdom of God that was going to dismantle injustice and poverty and sexism.
Step 3: Start Now and Start with You
It’s a simple step but not an easy one. I’d rather start this tomorrow and with someone else.
Part of movement called Amplify Peace, raising peace makers up. We listen intentionally to voices we don’t use listen. We learn. We live differently as a result. Then we repeat.
Women’s Banking Conference – The learned all the best practices and then they implemented them.
If you find yourself in a board room that look and think just like you, it’s time to hear some other voices.
Step 4: Never, Ever Give Up.
Morgan Stanley – The Gender Advantage – “achieving gender balance is a long-term objective that requires constant progress.”
The Disney Myth – we think some fairy godmother will just make it happen. Real empowerment and real freedom is an awfully long walk in the same direction. It will require a change to our lives every day.
Visited Robin Island – where they imprisoned Nelson Mandela. Guides of tour are former prisoners. The hardest part of experience at Robin Island? Leaving it. I came in broken, angry, furious. I met a group of guys who told me a better story, about a better future fueled by reconciliation. I believed them. When I left, I had to live it out in real life.
I’m dreaming about a whole bunch of leaders who imagine a better world. They start now and with themselves. They commit themselves to a reality and never, ever, ever give up.